I have joined a gym! Last night I went to the Lighthouse Hotel and joined for a very reasonable rate. It made me feel a bit guilty I have to say - rich white Western woman thinks gym is cheap and the price I paid almost without thinking is roughly equivalent to 2 months wages for some people in Sri Lanka.
Hmmm, this started off as a happy (I'm having a great time) post and now I feel a bit crap about it all. I expect this will happen time and time again over the next few months. I want to enjoy my stay and there are things I want to do but I can't just forget how unfair it is that I can do it and most people here (in their own country) can't.
I swam last night in an outdoor pool overlooking the Indian Ocean. It was beautiful but even while I was doing it there was a strange mix of emotions - I felt happy and at peace because of the beautiful surroundings but I also felt a little bit alone. I like being on my own normally (being such great company and all!) but when you're doing something amazing it's nice to share it with someone.
And I felt guilt then too because it's a 4 or 5 star hotel and they've got guards all around it presumably to keep the locals out. Now I know when you're on holiday you expect to be able to wander about your hotel grounds without people trying to sell you things for example, but it just felt wrong. I felt like I was getting special privileges just because I happened to be born in a rich country.
And it occurred to me that if I DON'T use the gym, I'll be annoyed at myself because it's 45 pounds down the drain and I'm not earning just now. But at the end of the day it really won't affect my life too much, I will simply brush it off. What a wasteful society I belong to. Maybe the guilt I've just discovered will ensure that I actually USE this gym. It's better than not using it but it doesn't exactly do anything to address the problems of wealth inequality in the world does it?
Yours very introspectively,
IndyGal!
Hmmm, this started off as a happy (I'm having a great time) post and now I feel a bit crap about it all. I expect this will happen time and time again over the next few months. I want to enjoy my stay and there are things I want to do but I can't just forget how unfair it is that I can do it and most people here (in their own country) can't.
I swam last night in an outdoor pool overlooking the Indian Ocean. It was beautiful but even while I was doing it there was a strange mix of emotions - I felt happy and at peace because of the beautiful surroundings but I also felt a little bit alone. I like being on my own normally (being such great company and all!) but when you're doing something amazing it's nice to share it with someone.
And I felt guilt then too because it's a 4 or 5 star hotel and they've got guards all around it presumably to keep the locals out. Now I know when you're on holiday you expect to be able to wander about your hotel grounds without people trying to sell you things for example, but it just felt wrong. I felt like I was getting special privileges just because I happened to be born in a rich country.
And it occurred to me that if I DON'T use the gym, I'll be annoyed at myself because it's 45 pounds down the drain and I'm not earning just now. But at the end of the day it really won't affect my life too much, I will simply brush it off. What a wasteful society I belong to. Maybe the guilt I've just discovered will ensure that I actually USE this gym. It's better than not using it but it doesn't exactly do anything to address the problems of wealth inequality in the world does it?
Yours very introspectively,
IndyGal!
5 comments:
I was in Sri Lanka hunners of years ago Anne as a Merchant seaman when it was still Ceylon.A much nicer name I still think than Sri Lanka.There used to be a beautiful place just outside Colombo called Mount Lavinia I think,is it still there?
Incidentally,if you come across a very elderly jeweller who admits to swindling a young Merchant seaman all those years ago than please kick his ass for me.I did a few things in my life for the very first time in Ceylon--some I cannot mention here!
GONYURSEL!!! I cannot believe you are saying such things lol. Good to hear from you. Yes Mt Lavinia is still there - unfortunately one of the targets yesterday. My friends in Colombo go to the hotel there sometimes. I will put the word out about the jeweller for you - there are some Weegies there, they'll sort him out ;-)
Are you sure the old lady standing up for you on the bus was not the remnants of respect for Memsahib?
This was a very common attitude to whites in my day.
It's possible. Awful isn't it? I went into a shop the other day to ask about sim cards and the woman was serving this local couple but she stopped serving them and started serving me. I honestly didn't realise what had happened until it was too late and I was horrified.
I suspect you will keep bumping into remains and reminders everywhere of the Empire, Anne
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