I’m getting more used to living in Sri Lanka but I’m not getting more used to the guilt. It’s interesting to observe how other people deal with being asked for money or to buy something. I like to hear how they deal with it internally and I am very conscious of my own reactions and motivations. It’s great because I really need something to over-analyse and beat myself up about – not!
I knew it would be a challenge for me to deal with these kind of things and it’s something I don’t find easy to deal with in Scotland so I had it pencilled in as one of the things to “sort out”. I’m not sure however, that I will ever really be able to do that.
At the weekend I went to Unawatuna, a beautiful beach resort that was wrecked by the tsunami. I met with other volunteers but at one point I went to the beach by myself for a couple of hours. In a 15 minute period I was approached by 5 people, one after the other. All were selling, none begging, although I did give one guy money rather than buy from him.
If this kind of thing would put you off coming to Sri Lanka on holiday, don’t let it. It’s very easy to say no and you don’t get pestered. Most tourists seemed to pretend that they’re not there and they just move on. My trouble is I don’t want to just say no and I definitely don’t want to ignore them. I'm not criticising those who do because who knows how I will deal with it once I've been here a while. But right now, I want to explain why I can’t buy from everyone. I don’t want them thinking I’m some rich white Westerner who couldn’t care less that they have no money. That, I suppose, is about making ME feel better but it’s not just about that.
I think I’m going to do separate postings about the different people I met on the beach because they were all interesting. Everyone has different views on how you deal with it all. A Sri Lankan told me to just ignore all of them. One volunteer told me it gets easier as time goes on and you come to realise that you can’t help everybody. And another said that I should stop trying to overcome the guilt because I won’t be able to. I think what she meant was that I am right to feel guilt about this massive gulf between rich and poor in the world. I think I agree with her. It will be interesting to see how my thinking develops on this one but for now I think I’ll have to accept that this is how I feel and I just have to live with it until I figure out some other way. My life will still be a lot easier than some of theirs, guilt or no guilt.
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2 comments:
Julie spent the summer in India and she encountered similar feelings...and people asking for money/buy something off them.
She said the taxi bicycles were funny as they are paid by shop owners to drop off tourists at various places along the way.
In the end she had to pay the taxi driver NOT to take them to these the shops.
LOL, yeah that happens here with tuk tuks although it's not happened to me. Julie has a unique way of dealing with problems.
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